I gave up listening to my mind a long time ago. The mind I believe is overrated. Logic tells you to hoard your money and save it for a rainy day. The heart is what tells you to give the last of your savings for the chemo of an absolute stranger – a mother of two young beautiful girls. The mind tells you to turn the other way, turn a blind eye when you see someone bullied. It warns you of the consequences of taking on an enemy much stronger. An enemy that in the status quo could be a friend opening doors to many opportunities. But the heart says go stand with the victim and support them in whatever way possible. Would flying be possible, would the mind be able to put man in space of the heart did not first desire it?
Every time I have shut out the voice of my heart I have regretted it. Of course it earned me the “Good Girl” medals and for a while I was happy to have conformed and been a martyr but what no one told me was I would have to betray the very soul and essence of me. Being “liked” would mean not being me in every possible way until my mind shut down and had to be jumpwired into some semblance of normalcy. A foggy existence of going through the motions while completely losing my identity because it seemed like a fine deal to earning the “Good Girl” badge.
It’s the losing it completely that makes you conscious of the beautiful, gentle, pure heart that you have been taught to ignore. Isn’t it within one’s heart that the Divine lives? Could the Divine ever lead you astray? As the famous Sufi poet says,
Masjid dha de, Mandir dha de,
dha de jo kuch dainda,
Par kisi da dil na dhawe,
Rab dilan vich rehnda. (Bulleh Shah)
Break down the Mosque, Break down the Temple,
Break everything that can be broken,
But don’t break somebody’s heart,
For in hearts does God reside.